7 Nightclub Stereotypes That Are So True

Though it’s not fair to make generalisations about people, some people are exactly what they appear to be and nothing more. When you go out clubbing, you meet all sorts of people, some are really unique while others are something out of cheesy movies.

You don’t know what it is about these people, but they just annoy you to your very core. It’s like all these people are born of the same cloth or were created in a cloning laboratory, because they are all exactly the same!

Note: I purposely left bouncers off this list because though a lot of them are picky, big, arrogant bullies, they are like this to do their job. The following are just naturally annoying.

1. Scantily Dressed Bimbos
Women probably hate this stereotype more than men, perhaps out of jealousy that they don’t have the tall toned bodies these ladies deemed as skanks and hos have that allows them to wear a tight revealing dress. They are always are the first ones to dance because, unlike others, they’re “fun”. But as “fun” as they may be, they’re basically just stuck up bitches who stick to their own kind and won’t even acknowledge anyone else.

2. Loud Chubby Girls
These girls try too hard at being social and fun, but at the same time often obnoxiously complain about people they don’t like. The worst of it is that they are loud and talk a lot about bullshit that no one else cares about. They always invite people they think are their friends but in reality they aren’t that close with them just so they look popular to make up for their appearance. These so called friends often cancel on these girls at the last minute, leaving her devastated.

3. Tall Muscly Guys
These guys know they look good. They ought to though; they spend most of their spare time at the gym. Always wearing tight tops and skinny jeans to show off their bodies, these guys are more or less alpha males, getting average joes jealous the way skanks offend plain girls. Don’t be surprised if that’s a pair of socks in their pants due to their steroid use affecting their lower body.

4. Middle Aged People
These older folk go clubbing to recapture their youth and dress suave so their clothes distract from their wrinkles. They look stupid and you feel sorry for them that they can’t accept they’re past their prime. But don’t mock them too fast; chances are you’ll be one of them someday!

5. Funny Drunk Guys
Even though the booze has slowed down their thought process, they are still very quick witted. These cocky dudes use humour to be the centre of attention and to impress girls, knowing that a common thing girls look for in a guy is him having a sense of humour; fair enough too.

6. Uptight Girls That Don’t Drink
These ladies are very serious, no fun at all. Why do they bother going clubbing to begin with? They say they want to be left alone, but really want to drag everyone down with them so they are having a shit time too. Cock blocks their friends as they think all men are sleazy and think of women only as sex objects. You try to be nice to them to get them to unwind, but they just can’t seem to get that pole out of their arse.

7. Eighteen Year Olds
They’ve just started going clubbing and love it. They’re beyond excited at finally getting to do adult things like drinking and hooking up. They thinks they are special, despite there being many other 18 year olds thinking like them.

Originally published here at barsandnightclubs.com.au on Thursday 30 August 2012

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