How To Be The Alpha Male In The Club

I watched Fight Club the other day and remembered how cool I used to think Brad Pitt’s character Tyler Durden was. Tyler Durden is the quintessential alpha male: handsome, buff, confident and gets plenty of action.

I mention Fight Club because being the alpha male isn’t just about being a muscly dude all the girls drool over. It’s about getting the respect and admiration from other guys too. For any guys reading this who don’t know what I’m talking about, think about how girls often say that some girl they saw was hot; it doesn’t mean they’re lesbians, it’s just admiration of them being the alpha female (is that even a term?). Well, the whole alpha male thing is essentially a male version of this. It’s about not only impressing girls with your assets, but showing the other guys who’s boss. Girls see that if you can even get other guys to be in awe of you, then you must be pretty awesome.

1. Be Confident
One phrase people say to those who are depressed or lack confidence is “I can’t love you until you love yourself”. In other words, you have to believe in yourself in order for girls to think you’re hot stuff. Showing that you’re secure is something that women will pick a mile away and will be naturally drawn to you. This is because women want, even with guys they’ve just met at a club, to assume the female role where he’s treating her to a good time, not having to act like the guy’s mum and comfort a scared little boy.

2. Lead The Pack
Show everyone who’s boss, including your mates. It’s nature that every group of friends has an unofficial leader, one who’ll lead the way and who was probably the one who suggested the group go out clubbing to begin with. This relates to being confident; if you not only have confidence in yourself but enough to take charge of what’s going on, women will be drawn to you.

3. Watch Your Body Language
If you’re nervous, you don’t have to say you are, your body will do that for you. Doing little things like posing in a casual stance or looking into a girl’s eyes when talking to her show her you’re carefree and cool about what’s going on, therefore she’ll relax around you too.

4. Be Fit
It certainly doesn’t hurt to have a bit of muscle on you. Women love both mental and physical strength, and doing all those weights and sit ups at the gym show you take care of yourself. Girls love a guy who does this because it is the male version of how women often worry about how many calories they intake and all the other extreme stuff they do to look good, so the guy is going through what she does.

5. Be A Snappy Dresser
Girls don’t want to kiss a guy who looks like a hobo living on the street. Girls take ages to get ready for a night out because they want to look hot; if a guy goes all out on buying clothes and taking time to look good, then she can relate to him on that level, therefore appreciate his attempt.

6. Be Flirtatious
All guys have to do a bit of flirting to avoid being put in her friend zone. Speaking in a confident tone of voice, saying she looks good, and a little bit of touching, like putting your hand on top of her’s or stroking her arm, show you’re not afraid to make a move. But don’t use cheesy pick up lines; you’ll look lame.

7. Be Funny
Girls love a guy with a sense of humour, so let your inner Jerry Seinfeld out. Talk about something funny that you did or that happened to you; if something you did involuntarily made her laugh, then it shows she thinks you’re tops. Don’t act silly or tell knock knock jokes though; chicks want a man, not a boy in Grade 3.

Originally published here at on Monday 6 August 2012

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