Reasons You Should And Shouldn’t Go Clubbing With Your Dad

During my recent adventures in America, I had desired to see as many bars and nightclubs as I could, wanting to see what their nightlife was like. I had heard stories about how you can drink booze anywhere on the streets of Las Vegas and how American bartenders put in more alcohol into their drinks than Aussie bartenders do. With all this in mind, you can see why I wanted to party American style.

But the memory that really stands out for me was going to two clubs in Miami with my father. Yes, the man who raised me thought we should hit the South Beach bars and drink up. He was already drunk from the massive cocktail he had at the restaurant we ate at earlier that night, and we headed back to our hotel room and everyone else was getting ready for bed (we had to get up early the next morning for a flight), he ranted about how they were all boring and should get off their iPads and enjoy the scenery. I concurred (I don’t have an iPad), and joined him in drinking up in Miami.

It was an odd experience, with both positives and negatives to it.

Why You Should

1. Trust
You know if shit’s going to go down if the wrong person reckons you’re staring at them funny, you know your dad’s definitely got your back. He was half responsible for you existing after all.

2. Funny To See Dad Being Drunk And Silly
No matter how many funny drunks you see in your lifetime, none will compare to seeing your parents wasted. Being the responsible, guiding parents who teach you right from wrong and what’s acceptable and unacceptable behaviour, it’s amusing to see them act the opposite way to what they taught you. Whether it’s just wanting pure nonsense or doing some stupid dance from the ’70s, you’re in for a treat. (I tried to film my dad dancing to Cuban music in one of the clubs, but he caught on to me; damn!).

3. He’ll Shout You Plenty Of Drinks
Unlike friendships that can end at any time, you and your dad are related for life. Provided you two get on (you wouldn’t go clubbing with him otherwise), his natural inclination to take care of you will take over and he’ll shout drinks. Of course, you should shout him some too, but he’ll be more than happy to beer up his natural drinking buddy.

Why You Shouldn’t

1. Awkward Talking About Girls And Picking Up
Even talking to your dad about hot girls, let alone trying to chat gals up, can be an awkward. It’s a weird subject for the two of you to talk about, as not only has the sexual politics of nightclubs changed since his clubbing days, but he’s your dad! You certainly don’t want to know about his sex life (especially where your mum’s concerned), and though you’re grown up, he still thinks of you as his little kid, and not wanting to acknowledge you’re a sexual being.

2. Making Smart Arse Comments To Others
Dads can be pretty chatty and be smart arses to you, and it’s even worse when drunk. It’s one thing for him to talk shit to you, but if he starts randomly talking to people in clubs or on the street, it’s awkward for everyone, and no one wants their dad accidentally picking a fight with someone over a problem that’s small or nonexistent.

3. Your Dad (Probably) Looks Out Of Place
In many respects, nightclubs are considered a “young persons” thing, and by the time you’re in the your 40s or older, society expects you to start drinking at the local pub. People will wonder why he’s there, and they may come to the conclusion that he’s a sleazy old man (i.e. old guys at strip clubs). One of the clubs my dad and I went to didn’t have that many girls around, so dad just asks some random where all the chicks were (embarrassing!). He later asked one of the scantily clad waitresses why it seemed dead; apparently it’s off season for Miami. Too bad.

Originally published here at on Monday 14 October 2013

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